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Some of the ways we may be able to make someone comfortable in a conversation are as listed below:
1. Pay undivided attention: This not only means that we stop doing other activities like checking our phone, cleaning up the space and other such activities. It also means that we stop engaging in our own thoughts and problems for that time when we are conversing with someone. Eye contact is very necessary.
2. Show curiosity and care: Express care and concern by acknowledging how they feel and allowing them to speak. Be interested in the details of their story and watch their body language and voice modulation. Allow pauses.
3.Ask questions: Asking relevant questions to understand their situation better will give you a clear picture of their situation and also help them understand that you are willing to hear their story. You may ask questions like – “How do you feel about it?”, “What do you think it means?”, “Do you want to tell me in more detail?” etc. Clarify if you need to understand better.
4. Be mindful of your own thoughts: While listening to someone, do not think about solutions or what could have been done. Remind yourself that the situation was experienced by them first-hand and their emotions are real. Maybe make notes or record, meaningfully.
5. Listen more – Allow the person to speak and be patient as they try to articulate their thoughts and feelings. Some people take time to put their thoughts into words. Do not urge them through the conversation.
These are some of the tried and tested ways to have a meaningful conversation with people.
